The attitude came out of nowhere, and the words stung more than you want to admit.
What’s usually happening
Talking back is usually a big feeling looking for a way out, or a child testing how much power they have. They’re learning to have their own voice. Our job is to teach them how to use it with honor.
Try this
- 1Lower your voice instead of raising it.
- 2Give them a do-over before you give a consequence.
- 3Come back later, when everyone is calm, to mend and restore.
What to say
- “I want to hear you. Try that again with a respectful voice.”
- “You can disagree with me. You can’t disrespect me.”
- “I’m going to wait until we can both talk calmly.”
A gentle answer turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up wrath.
Inside the membership, you’ll find the full talking-back plan, with what to say and consequences that fit each age.
This is covered in The Discipline Overshare Guide
- 01What’s happening
- 02What should I know
- 03What do I say
- 04Mom, remember
- 05When to get help
Find your family’s season
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- Every guide and toolkit. The words for the conversation in front of you, for every age and stage, plus every new guide the day it releases.
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- Ask Jess. For the question you can’t stop thinking about at 11pm. Answers drawn only from Jess’s teaching.
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